This Must Be It, Welcome To The New Year

Yep another new year post. Probably a bitter one too, I just feel it coming.

I was able to keep two of my three resolutions this year. The first and most important was to never have another year like 2010, and never have to deal with The Succubus again. On that front, mission success. But really I do not think my life could ever be that bad again. The second was to finally start, and finish P90X, which I did, but sadly got too lazy to keep it up. The third.... and most repeated was yet again a fail. For the last 5 years I have wanted to have a family by the end of the year. Find a nice, sane woman and start to settle down, jump into the next chapter of my life. But thanks to God's great sense of humor, here I am, spending New Years alone with a cat, preparing for bed for my shitty job at 0500. Have been single for the last almost 3 years and have had only a handful of dates is how God gets his jollies, but that's cool. Maybe that was a tad harsh.... but that just leads into a whole other bag that is probably best not opened right now. So what is in store this year? No "new year new me" BS that you always hear. I know exactly who I am, and I like it. Sure, some things will change, they always do, but I do not need a new me. And my hopes of finding a good girl fade more and more every year, and the deployment this year does not help. But because I am a fool, and for some reason hold on to God's cruelty, for the 6th year in a row my first is to find a wife. The second? To eventually move past being pissed at God.... either by just letting him have his fun and accept it, hoping for the best, or pray that he brings something great my way. And lastly, probably the most easy resolution, to have my career path laid out in black and white and moving on it. Sadly the Succubus still has a hold on me there. The bitch ruined my career and I am still struggling in that department. Maybe I should just start with that one, it has the most hopes of coming true.

2012 was not terrible, but it was not where I wanted it to be. I made big changes in my life, my point of views, and created a new path in my future by moving to Alabama. But I had hoped it would finally bring me back to my high points in life, that is, everything before 2010. I guess the year could have been worse though. I do have a job, a home, and finally closer to family. On most fronts I am content and happy.

I guess a lot of my resolutions come down to attitude. Laying out my career path and getting it done and the whole "God, stop poking me with a stick" thing can change with a change of heart probably. Being a religious man I know that if I did that then my life probably would be as great as it was 3 years ago and before.

In 2013 I will see my second deployment for the USAF. I think it will do me a ton of good. Time to think, a lot of alone time, and a good amount of time with less distractions in life.

2013 will bring new things for me in my music. I want to learn to write better songs than the crap I have written in the past. Maybe some writing lessons.

2013 will bring me closer to my family, just like 2012 did compared to 2011.

2013 will bring closer friendships.

Most importantly, 2013 will bring the Meat Hammer face to face with the world yet again, and as before, I will simply rip off its balls and come out on top.

To all of you bringing in 2013 the right way, please, bottoms up and have a drink for me. Enjoy being next to your friends, live it up, and remember, the year will be what you make it.

Get out of here you old itchy 2012, welcome 2013.

Together We'll Ring In The New Year

The Meat Hammer

All I Want To Do Is Trade This Life For Something New

I just really get down and so tired of it sometimes. Fuck you life.

True Words

The Meat Hammer

Girl is a Dime Piece

I posted the following status on my Facebook page.

When I see a 10+ girl, who just by all rights is the most beautiful woman in the world, I naturally think the worst of her in every way. Slut, retarded, selfish, cheater, shallow, annoying, and probably the worst woman in the world to be with. 

I got the two responses I expected, the guys agreed, the girls did not. Through the conversation other things came to light about personality, being shallow, self esteem and things like that. So I have now been motivated to blog about it in general, and as of right now I am not real sure where this blog is going but it should be interesting. What I plan to do is take some of the comments and speak to them in detail.

** during this I am excluding any famous people such as actresses and singers. I am referring only to the people you see at a bar, Target, in school or a place to eat. Just the average person.**

In my opinion, a girl who is a 10 based on nothing but looks...

Are typically bitches. Btw the first girl, amazing (talking look only right now) but falls right into the previous stated status above. I am willing to bet she is a shallow slut. She would only be around girls that look like her and think she is better than everybody else in the world. 

Now lets focus on just looks for a moment. Yes that girl is beautiful there is nobody that would argue. But the "good guys" would rather have a girl that is real. A girl that has a personality, who is smart, and most of all, grounded. A girl that has self esteem, but not to the point where she thinks she deserves Zeus. Mostly, those girls are what society would call "thick" or fat if you will. Those are the type of looks only that I would go for. I do not want them so skinny I will break their back like Bane when I give them a hug. But I want my hands to be able to touch when they go around her back. Such as...

Minus the Alabama jersey of course. Society would think the girl above is a bit overweight, a muffin top, chunky... or a number of other things. However, this is a great body style. Now guys, take your focus off her face and breasts..... ok, you done yet? She is not skinny like magazines and TV tells us women need to be. She is not fat, or BBW, or overweight. Matter of fact she is very beautiful. She has meat on her bones and is thick, they way a real woman is. Now, I want to get off just the looks portion and get into self esteem.

When a guy rates a girl 1-10 looks are only the first part, assuming we have never met the girl. Self esteem and personality go a long way. In fact, much further than looks. If the girl is dumber than a bag of rocks, she can dropped from a 7 to a 3. If she has no self esteem, that drops you too, along with sense of humor, outlook on life and a number of things. I want to dig deeper into self esteem. but first I will share this fast story about why i will be so hard on this issue. I am 5'9, I weigh 210 lbs. I am not fat, I am not a skinny tone guy. I have a beer gut, but I am in shape. For Halloween I plan on wearing a full, skin tight spandex costume that will highlight my gut. I will be doing multiple activities in town dressed like this, and do not care that people will think, "wtf is he thinking that's gross" Why? because I know I am an attractive dude. 

I know girls with low... crippling self esteem and I have no effing clue why. I am going to talk about 2 different ladies right now that will encompass every girl in the world. The first, super skinny girl like the first 2 pictures. The second, a "thick" girl like the one in the jersey. 

This girl is very skinny, and very beautiful. She works out every day and eats very little. Is on a diet to lose more weight. If she did she would weight 12 lbs soaking wet. But she thinks she is not beautiful. Guys have told her to lose more weight. These are the type of guys that only go after the first pictured girl, and would never give the jersey girl a shot in hell. I have told her that she should eat more. She is a very beautiful girl, and the personality involved with everything easily ranks her between a 7-8. This is just on the guy scale, on the personal scale she would be a 10. 

The second girl is much like the jersey girl, and covers most women in the world with low self esteem. No you are not skinny. You will not fit into a size 0, 1, 2, 3 maybe even 456 jeans. (I have no clue what those sizes actually are) but that does not mean you are not a high ranking just on looks. The girls I know that fall into this category also have some of the best personalities. Another easy 10 on my personal scale for reasons other than just looks. But based on society they would be a 6... maybe. In my experience and opinion, the thick girls are the best ones to have. 

The point of self esteem: you create your own. I hate when i see girls like the jersey girl, or my skinny friend mentioned above with low self esteem. There is no reason for it. My mentor has taught me that self esteem is created by yourself. So to all the girls like the jersey girl (I know a lot of you), stop beating down on yourself. If you want to be happy then do it. That is the harsh reality. I mentioned I have a gut which most girls do not think is attractive, but I would talk to any girl, and walk around shirtless at the beach because I know I am a good lookin dude, and I don't give a shit about the people who think otherwise. 

Along with this issue came came single mothers. Not sure how though so I want to chime in on this as well. It is easier to get a date when you are single with no kids than single with kids. This is just a fact. There is nothing wrong with single mothers though. From my standpoint it is good and bad for both parties. lets focus on the bad. When I start to date a girl, I already have to fight with the everyday life for her attention and time to start building a relationship. Kids just add to the battle. I am told by everyone I know that I am great with kids, even though they are super annoying. so that is not my issue, but I like to get out and have fun doing anything, and single moms just can not do that. I feel like we lose out on that part of the relationship. We also have to deal with any baby-daddy issues. Screw that man, not worth it. Also we always have in the back of our head, what if this pans out, I gotta be a dad for these kids. It could also mean in some situations, I will never have a kid of my own now since we will have her kids. I have dated a single mother before, and yes it had its complications and no it did not work out, but not because of her being a mother. I would date a single mother again in the future, but I would make clear to her although I do not want to be more important attention wise to her children, I do not want to be put on the back burner. It is a two way street, you try to make time to build a relationship, and i am 1 million percent ok with you canceling plans for your child, or not being able to join me for something because you do not have a baby sitter.

However on the positive side of things:

-- for the girl: if you are a single mother and start dating a guy that is ok with you having children. If he sticks around, you know you have a good guy. He is willing to accept all of that. This should take out most of your debating on if you should stay with him or not. Single women with no kids do not have this advantage. 

-- for the guy: we know about the previous statement.

I think I have lost the point I want to get across here. If I see a girl in the bar who is like the first two pictures, sure I would love to be in their company and be seen with them and probably take them home and never call again. They are super beautiful girls... but that is typically where the good stuff ends. They are whores, and mean, shallow, surrounded by drama, and just a pain in the ass high maintenance. Obviously this is not true for everyone. I know a few girls that based off looks alone are 10's, and they are some of the most humble, fantastic girls in the world. But they are the 1%. Take the opposite of that, girls like the one pictured in the jersey, most guys would go for the 10's above them, but in reality, those are the girls to take.

To the ladies who are involved in the creation of this blog. If you read this, I want you to know that you are all beautiful. You are all of the things  a good guy looks for. A couple of you even have that good guy. Others are still looking. I do not want to say just "let yourself go" because when a girl does that she looks like a -12, but do not put all of your focus on looks. It is only the first step. You are all beautiful and can easily get any guy you wanted... the bigger issue is what kind of guy do you want, and what kind of guy are you chasing. Normally they are two different guys. 

I am sure I will want to edit this, or continue this in another blog somehow. Please one way or another leave a comment about this one. I can take it.

*****And any guy that reads this and disagrees and thinks the first 2 pictures are the real winners, you are probably a bigger douche than Hitler and Casey Anthonys love child.... if she didn't kill it. But seriously  go fuck yourself 3 ways from yesterday.****

The Meat Hammer

The Bully Post

Let me start by saying most of you will be angry at this, some will be surprised, and a select few will agree.

Before I dive into this I want to make very clear, I feel sympathy for kids who get bullied, it sucks. I would never wish for kids to be beat up, depressed suicidal, or anything that comes along with it. Suicide is also something that I am strongly against, I have known many people who have done this to themselves, and many friends who have suffered from it. I have a brother in arms that did this and it kills me to know it happens. I really can not stress these points enough before you read this.

Kids get bullied for a number of reasons, being fat, poor and can't afford the cool clothes, being gay, being mentally ill, having a disorder, stuttering, being a nerd or geek, being a slut, making the wrong popular kid angry, being weak, and a million more. Now kids are getting to the point where they kill themselves or others. This is just sick.... but not for the reason you may think.

Up until the 6th grade I had a great childhood involving school. It was super easy to make friends, nobody really fought or picked on me. In fact, while at I.L. Branch Elementary in California I had a smokin hot girlfriend lol. I kid you not. Then we moved to Alabama and I joined HG middle school for the 6th grade. My entire school experience changed then and lasted until high school graduation. I have no clue why I was one of the kids singled out but I was. For 6 years I was called gay, pushed around, shoved into lockers, beat up, beat up by girls, called every name in the book, the end of every joke, very few friends, always picked last for group sports, even when I was last the team did not want me, in high school (even though I thought I was pretty good) I was singled out when playing football in ROTC, I ran to my next class my freshmen year because I was the guy they wanted in the dumpster on freshmen Friday, all of the things that kids deal with today, I got also. Yes social media as well, I was around for MySpace. I was bullied everyday for 6 years. I wanted to play sports so bad in high school, but I never would because all the guys on the football team were the ones that would beat me up.  I would cry myself to sleep at times, I would beg God to make it stop, even get angry at him for making me go through it. I soon realized that would not happen, and began to embrace the fact that I was unpopular and began to have fun with it. I would give them reasons to laugh at me and somehow that made me feel OK about it all. So I know what it is like to be that kid, and that is why I can say that kids today are too weak minded to handle being picked on, and that is what is sick about bullying.

I now have 2 associates degrees and working on my bachelors, I am building on a second career, I am a decorated NCO in the worlds greatest Air Force, I have fought in a war, I have been around the country and outside of it seeing and doing great things, I own my home and land, I have experienced things that 80% of my graduating class has not, and all of this because I did not kill myself, or the kids who pushed me around.

Now I am friends with most of the people I went to school with, those same guys that would push me around and call me names. We are all older now, and all of that is in the past. If anybody would ever try to apologize to me for it, and they have, I would tell them to stop, because really, I should thank them for making me the man I am today.

Society today has made kids weak minded. I am tired of seeing and hearing all of this anti bully BS. All of these kids hurting themselves, committing suicide and hurting others because they are picked on. They took the weak way out. And I feel strongly that if they didn't do something to themselves now, then later on when they could do more then they would. For example shoot up an office, set off a bomb, become a serial killer, or any number of violent horrific things that they could do when they are adults. It is probably a good thing they are not alive now, it saved more lives in the future. Harsh I know, but I am a realist. Killing yourself or others is a choice, and it is the wrong choice, theses kids were too weak to suck it up and make something of themselves. That is the sad part, these kids could have used all of the negativity and done some amazing with it. This is the bigger problem here, not bullying, but how we baby the young generation today. I understand that not everybody is capable to turn the most negative things positive like I am..... no that is wrong, capable is not the right word,  how about strong minded enough. Everybody is capable of it. I know it is not easy, it took me 15 or 16 years to even begin to think about that. But in those years I did not try to kill myself... and I never fully gave up mentally. Now because of my childhood, including being bullied made me a stronger man. It kills me to think of what this generation will not achieve because they are so narrow minded and can't handle somebody who does not like them.

I am going to get to the point where I start rambling about this and the point will get lost, so let me put it in black and white right now.

I do not condone bullies, it is mean, and unnecessary. But it is a part of life. it builds character... if you let it. Kids today for some reason are not taught how to deal with anything negative, and that will ruin their future, and generations after it.

I am glad that I had the school years that I did because it taught me that life is tough, but no matter how bad it gets, I can make it better. Being bullied combined with my experiences in the military and being abused by my biological father made me a strong, unshakable man.


The Meat Hammer



** I would like to note that this highlights the negative of my school years. I had, and still do have great friends from high school, and fantastic memories. ****

just drunk thoughts

so after class tonight I decided to buy a bottle of rum and make summertime's, in honor of cinnamon bear. So now I sit on my front porch, half a bottle down and not stopping until it's done, listening to only 90's music, playing my guitar and figuring shit out. These are my drunk random thoughts. So relax, STFU and enjoy....

My life is fucked right now. I have almost no money, and in debt 2500 to my folks. A 27 year old man... really?

I need to take charge. I have probably the best mentor a man could have, second to my old man. This guy has adopted a saying I made up for pure fun and made it into something that is real, and he is living it more than me. Not anymore. I am moving on, I am Kenning rises.

I need to do something big in my life, fast.... I never wanted to but I am now convinced to join the police force here in Alabama.

3 years ago a 2 year literally saved my life. he is now 5, and once again he has motivated me in a way he will not understand for years.

I have been single a while now, and have had a couple chances to change that. For one reason or another I have not. Why? WTF am I scared of?

I do not have a job in field right now and that shakes me to the core. There is no reason for this. I am currently finding a course to get C+ certified for a job to go along until the police bring me in.

I AM batman, and batman is Kenning.

I was told this weekend that kenning is not just a saying but a way of life. I in some way without meaning to have motivated a great man, and that makes me realise that I need to live up to this.

I just poured a drink that was 3/4 rum and 1/4 dr. pepper. It taste AWESOME

I am happy, and I really have almost no reason to be. Maybe it is the rum, but I think it might be something more.

I am sitting in the rain, with an umbrella covering my laptop right now and loving every minute of it. I feel alive.

I have found motivation in the worst of places this past week. A young man I used to baby-sit recently joined the army. I can not express how proud of him I am, really. he just got married. I felt old. I was bummed out his wedding night. Then I got home, and realised the young boy that has grown into a man, that I may or may not have motivated, influenced, or helped has become something great, suddenly no longer makes me feel old, or like a failure, but now motivated. How things change.

I have done great things in my life, I have helped and motivated, I have achieved, I have grown, I have moved on, I have overcome, WTF am I depressed about.

GIRLS lol.... holy shit.

I know of a few women in my life.... Don't know where I am going with this. I know a girl that I could have started something maybe great here in Alabama. I denied it. I know a girl I could have done something great with, but I waited to long. I know a girl that could have been great, but she is a bitch. I know a girl that my life would not be what it is without her, but I have no clue what I was supposed to do about it.

I am getting rained on, and it feels amazing,

I have a fantastic family, minus my sister. my folks have been amazing, and even though I may make wise cracks and make them feel bad with my jokes, I really only want and mean the best for them. My mom is beyond amazing. My old man taught me how to be a man. how the hell do you repay that?

best part about drinking on a large deck alte at night... not going inside to piss. BRB.

90's music was by far the best of my time..... Linkin Park excluded.

cinnamon- do you remember when I gave you the peacock... lol thats a funny word. I tried my hardest to just tell you some things and I probably failed because the military has caused me to not talk emotionally. you have helped me so much. you tore me out of my shell. Musically and mentally. I no longer hate all women because of you. you changed me, you fixed me. I am forever in debt to you even though you will deny it and I can not wait to see you next month!

I can not believe this umbrella idea is actually working and protecting my laptop and phone in the rain lol

Mentor: man you are a constant everyday motivation  for me. And It is an honor to know I have helped you. I don't want to get gay here so just thank you.

I just took a drink and got excited that the cup was almost full because the bottle of rum is almost gone.

I am an uncle, and teaching my nephew important things means the world to me. recently my uncle had a talk with me and told me that my cousin, who looked up to me did not like who I have become. That was a hard pill to swallow when I thought about it. It got me to thinking what I need to  change. Then I realised that I do not need to change, but rather be aware of my company. I am interested and laugh at things that I need not show everyone else. lol I just sounded smart. I fell kind of guilty.

If I keep talking shit will come out that has no business coming out. I need to just go finish drinking and figure shit out.

Final words, Kenning is on the rise, and is becoming something I never expected. Watch out because it will effect you all.


The Meat Hammer

Soul Searching------ this can suck

Soul searching is something that nobody likes to do, but is required from time to time. Normally when you do some soul searching, you face things about yourself that you hate, and very few things that you like. The point of it all is to do more of the good, and change the bad. Sometimes you are just looking for some kind of answer. Well I recently did some soul searching myself and I discovered I do a lot of things that would be viewed as bad things.

I have done a lot of things that I should not be proud of...

I convinced an ex girlfriend that cheated on me with my best friend that I still loved her and we should get back together. I took her out to a nice dinner, got a hotel room, took her back, had my way with her, then when she fell asleep I left her there with no car and no money.

I have stolen things in the past; I download music, movies and software.

I have been rude to complete strangers, and probably made them cry when they got home alone.

Recently a girl asked me what I was looking for in a relationship, I told her I am looking for someone who will not eat my first born and told her to join a gym.

I hold grudges against a few people. I will never forgive my biological father. I despise him. I hate my sister and will never have any sort of relationship with her again. There are others that have done me wrong, used me, and just treated me badly that I wish bad things upon.

I have what I think is one of the best sense of humors around, but others view me as racist, sexist, rude, improper, uncaring, unsympathetic, wrong, hateful, and have no soul. I have made religious jokes, abortion jokes, murder jokes, and probably all way too soon after an even happens. I die laughing.

I have used many women. I have told women that I love them just so they would sleep with me. I have had women cheat on their significant other with me.

I have used many other people. I have treated people badly, took them for granted, lied to them, and walked over them and disrespected them. I have thrown them under the bus to make myself look better.

I have broken many laws, and cheated in school.

I have offended more people than I can count, and I enjoy it.

I have laughed at mentally ill people, extremely obese people, people who walk funny, people with a gunt, and the styles that black people wear.

I let a friend take a ticket for me when I was cutting doughnuts in the school yard.

I have sexually assaulted waitresses and random girls at a bar by smacking their ass.

I have met/seen people that are so stupid that I think it should be illegal to let them live. Where is natural selection?

I have “stolen” money from previous jobs by saying I was at work a few minutes earlier or later than I was.

You do a soul search to look for something. And sometimes, many times you find something you were not looking for. You learn a lesson and you feel revitalized after. This case was no different.

After some extensive soul searching, I did discover something about myself…

I am AWESOME.

The Meat Hammer

The curse words.... or are they? MA

This topic has already offended and made people angry… so if you have a closed mind just stop reading.

So I have wondered in the past but just now decided to look it all up. Where did all of those “bad words” come from? What do they really mean? Why are they so bad? Who said they were bad words?

I was raised to not say those words. Anytime I did I took a bite of soap, even had the liquid soap once. Terrible taste. As I grew up I learned that these words are a part of everyday conversation, and as time went on I began to use them as well. I personally do not believe they are bad words and do not understand why everybody thinks so. On that note, I do know that people do not like them and find them offensive, so I know what groups to not say those words in. So, with that said I am questioning this: Other than the fact that moms and dads say it is wrong, and society thinks they are wrong, why are these words so bad?

Fuck-the most basic meaning of sex… So if it is just another word for sex, why can we say sex and not fuck? Some will say because it is vulgar slang for sex… ok that seems fair. Who says it’s vulgar? What is so vulgar about it? There is a large thinking that this word comes from the acronym fornication under Consent of the King. The story says that in the olden days of ancient England, if you wanted to have a kid, you needed permission from the king. If it was granted then you had a sign to hang on your door that said fornication under Consent of the King- or F.U.C.K. Well this is awesome but not true.

What about the acronym For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge? This was said to be used to name prostitutes and a way of pointing them out, another awesome idea, but not true.

I have done a lot of looking into the real origin of the word and although I am just some interested dude who wants to know why I am not allowed to say fuck, this is what I believe to be the truth. It comes from word of mouth, really. In Low German it means copulate, or sex, same in Swedish and Dutch.  In those languages the word was not even fuck; it was other words that soon translated into fuck. Word of mouth spread this word and it was taboo to say out loud. So who made it a bad word? Sadly I have no clue, but some king or other leadership figure down the road did not like it so it was said to be wrong. There honestly is no reason for it to be. So fuck it.

Shit- This could have been an awesome one, but just like fuck, the acronym is just not true. Ship High In Transit- supposedly used as a marking when shipping fecal matter on a ship, it was supposed to be on the top so it did not get hot and wet and stink up the other shipments. Cool story though. Really, it is exactly what we think it is.   Scite (dung) scitte (diarrhea) and scitan (to defecate) are Old English words. So why can I not walk around saying I just took a shit? How is that different than saying dump, or poop, or number 2? Really, if you look at it, there is no difference. Once again somebody said it is a vulgar, offensive word. I think I am starting to see a trend here.

Bitch- a female dog right? Well yes, actually it is. So why and when did it become a bad word? Well finally I can bring a real answer. The Greek goddess of the hunt, Artemis, was often seen with a pack of dogs and often transformed into a dog herself.  Because of this, a women would be referred to as bitch: sexually depraved beasts who grovel and beg for men.

Getting into the next 2 words, Ass and Damn will be interesting and probably very offensive unless you open your mind up a bit and maybe look it up yourself, and bitch starts to lead into it.

The modern word bitch comes from the Old English bicce, which probably developed from the Norse bikkje, all meaning ‘female dog’. Its use as an insult was propagated into Old English by the Christian rulers of the Dark Age to suppress the idea of femininity as sacred.

Oooooo….. ouch. Let me interject here, I am a Christian and I know that in the past Christians have caused their fair share of problems, even in modern day they do. Does that mean Christians are bad? Or problematic? No, not at all, there are always a few in the crowd that give everybody a bad name. This is a prime example.

Ass- donkey, or butt. Obviously we all know ass is in the Bible, and at one time or another we all tried to use that excuse for saying it. And your parents would say you didn’t mean it that way, well they are right. Ass, in its original form is a donkey. So when did it turn to butt? Around 1785. The term arse slowly transformed to ass. Some believe it was even as early as 1594 in the play A Mid Summer Nights Dream, as a form of word play referring to a woman in a sexual way.

Damn- When this word was first used, the meaning was loss, or harm. Wait, what? Really?

Damn in its original form was nothing bad at all, so how did it become to be a “bad word”? The verb Damnare soon spread its meaning to “pronounce judgment upon” which seems to make a little more sense in today’s world. I damn you to hell, you are damned, you will go to damnation, etc. In modern day Bibles, the word is defined as exclusion from divine mercy; condemnation to eternal punishment. Damn or any version of the word does not appear in the Old Testament, but multiple times in the New Testament in some versions. This has been argued because these words replaced the original wording of the Bible.

I just want to repeat that so it is not misunderstood. SOME versions of the Bible use the word damn multiple times in the New Testament, NOT all versions. Damn replaced the original words used because of the way society changed the meaning of damn and other forms of the word.

Ok, so in a fast review….

Fuck- Lots of theories about where the word came from, no one is positive. It was of German decent and means sex. Whoever decided it was a vulgar word passed that along and it has carried through time, probably because talking about sex was so taboo back in the day. We as society just choose to go along with it.

Shit- an Old English word meaning dung. Well at least society got that one right. Again how this is a bad word I am not sure. Yes we use it as things other than dung but does that make it bad?

Bitch- came from the idea of a Greek Goddess who turned into a dog. Somewhere down the road Christians decided to use it as a “cut-down” to take away the sacredness of femininity. This is the only one that has a small chance of being a bad word.

Ass- another word that society decided to change the meaning of and make it taboo. Donkey, everybody knows that, and when used to refer to a part of the anatomy it is bad… how?

Damn- man we are good at making words bad because we want to. The meaning of this word has changed 100% from the original intent. But even in its new meaning, is it really that taboo?

As time goes forward these words will become less taboo and less people will find it offensive. This is proven by the statement history repeats itself. Damn is a very common word now that is one of the “lesser” curse words, but ages ago it was one of the worst things you could say. It has slowly become acceptable. This will continue to happen with all words.

I have drawn the conclusion that society is the only reason why words are bad. Most of these words did not exist when Jesus walked the earth, and when the Word was written, so the excuse that God says they are wrong makes no sense. If you feel like you can prove that wrong I am open. Someone recited many Bible verses to me about this, but none of them referred anything to words that society says are wrong. Every Bible verse in a nutshell said do not say mean blasphemous things against God, and do not say mean things to other people. But if society decides what words are mean, then how do we know what words God thinks are mean? He is better than society. And yes, I do understand that those Bible verses can mean don’t call your neighbor and asshole mother fucker. That is mean.

What if I decided that the word slyper now meant sex instead of fuck? Does that mean that because it is not the word “sex” that it is a bad word? Well tough, you can go slype yourself.

I hope I got my point across that these words are only bad because we say they are. But who are we to say?

-The Meat Hammer

Faith, You Gotta Have Faith

It is hard sometimes to get things off your chest without it sounding like you want pity, help or sympathy. This is no different. Those that really know me know that I hate asking for help, I hate to borrow money or need assistance to get out of anything, and when it is offered I turn it down unless it is my absolute last option. Please keep that in mind here, I am not asking for your sympathy or prayers, I am a big boy and can figure things out myself, but it always helps to get things out there. I would probably not have this conversation face to face with anybody…

You gotta have faith. Faith.

When I was in middle and high school I was very active with my church and youth group. Yes I caused a lot of trouble, did lots of bad things but I was a religious kid, prayed all the time, had lots of faith, and never questioned it. It helped that I was always around a church family. I have had that on and off the last 9 years. I think that’s a major thing to have to help keep a man straight.

I only pray when things are bad, when someone is in bad health, when I get into some sort of trouble, or for someone I know. Not very often. I have not prayed for myself in a long time; have not asked for help to get me straight with the big guy. The last time I prayed constantly was this past summer when I was in church and playing in the church band, I went to house church every Monday night.  It felt good. Before that it had been 3 years.

I am a religious man at heart, I know God, I know I am saved, I know I am going to Heaven. Everybody that really knows me knows this is true. I also know that I am far from having a barely decent relationship with God. No that’s not ok, I know that also… but I don’t really feel too bad about it. I got a lot weighing me down and not stuff that is easy to let go of. And yes I know if I tried it probably would be, but I’m comfortable in life right now and not in a rushed pace to change any of it.

------ “Kenn you’re going to hell”----- There I said it for you so you don’t have to.

I am moving back home soon, and I know after I get there I will start to get back to my roots, I am excited about it, but not in a big rush to jump right back into it for selfish reasons. I know differently, but I have a lot to fix myself before I get back there.

I fear that I am going to be rushed into something I am not ready for, and I feel bad about that. My mom is pushing to get me right in the thick of things again with a church that I don’t know, church family I don’t know, and she wants me to be right back where I was 10 years ago, and that will not happen overnight. I want to take things slow, be just another face in the crowd and ease my way back into my faith.

I have lots of reasons to have faith, and lots to not; and even though right now I am more in the not section I still hold onto some. I fear that if I am pushed too hard then I might just postpone trying to get back with the big guy upstairs. That’s just human nature.

God gave us all free will to mess up our lives as much as we can, and he lets us. He also knows that when we hit the bottom and go back to him that he will pull us out. I hit that rock bottom and have pulled myself back out. No, not by myself, there is no way, I know God had a hand in getting me to where I am, but I have never asked for it, or thanked him for it. Hell, the closest I came was screaming in a drunken state, “What the hell man? You get some sort of sick pleasure out of this? What am I going to do now? You better fix this shit.” I know that in order for him to really bring you back up the first step is asking for it. Not when you’re drunk of course. Many times in the past he has hit me in the back of the head with a 2X4, and I get my shit together… for a period of time. This time he has not hit me as much as he handed me the 2X4 and said whenever you are ready.

God has done a great deal for me in the last 2 years, and even in the last 2 weeks. And I think this is all part of his plan to bring me back, and I also think he knows that it will take some time. I think this is the start of a lot of changes with my life and that he is going to make everything better. There is a line in a movie, Dogma where the two angels are talking about how down their life has been and one says to the other “When God, when the fuck is it my time?” and I have often said the same. I think maybe my time is now.

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 I can have a somewhat warped opinion of God compared to others. Yes I am fearful of what he can do, and I respect him for who he is and what he does, but when I do talk to him I do not put him up on a pedestal. I talk to God like he is a buddy at the bar, just normal conversation. I have been told by some that this is disrespectful, but the way I see it, he knows my heart, and he knows that it is just the way I am. Who are you to tell me how to pray? I have been told that I am blasphemous. While in a lot of eyes this may be true, I fall back to the same; he knows my heart and knows that I am not. If my mother knew some of the things I say and joke about she would make me eat a bar of soap. I have been called this because I make off colored jokes about religion, God, the Bible and faith, and I have a foul mouth. I know that I am not blasphemous, God knows I never say things like that in a blasphemous manner, and let’s be honest God was human, he has a sense of humor. I mean, he made Bama football right? Who says God can’t find humor in everyday things without it being an attack against him?

I know this blog was all over the place and had no real rhythm, but it was a bunch of things on my chest this last week and I just wanted to get it out. I am not asking for prayers for me to get back to where I should be, not asking for pity or sympathy, I just wanted to say it out loud. I am well aware of where I am and what I am doing, and that’s what matters first. I know there are a lot of people who have been praying for me for a long time. My family, their church family, very close friends, and I appreciate that very much. But without my heart being ready, it is not going to happen. I have to meet him half way.

This was too serious…

The Meat Hammer

Aint nothin but a G thang

What a week it has been. My life took a major turn this week and I am now busier because of it for the next 2 months. Through a series of (un)fortunate events I am yet again making a big move in my life, and going back to Alabama where I did most of my growing up. Buckle in.

My folks own the land and home that I grew up in, and were renting it out to a friend of my dad’s. Well things happened and that man is no longer alive.  Now my folks were left to decide what to do with the home that I grew up in.

Let’s side track for a moment. Mom and dad have been declining in health the last few years and I have wanted to go home to be closer to them just in case. The situation just never seemed right. I had too much going on and it would have been too much of a challenge to move back. Now back to the story.

I was offered that if I moved back home that I could live in the home I grew up in, and not just live there but own it and the land it is on. This is a hard thing to turn down. Now where I am now I have a great job, a military job, and school full time. Not so easy to walk away from. A lot of things would need to fall into place for this to work. So I decided to just look around and see what my options were. I found a lot of good things.

Fast forward about 12 hours from then and I have figured out a new unit to transfer to, a new school to transfer to, and a new job to transfer to. This just seems to simple for something that should be extremely complicated.

My new military unit is a short 6 hour drive away, not bad since I only have to do it once a month. Not only did that work out nicely, but that unit is only 45 minutes from my nephew. Yes, the one that Bama hardly lets me talk to and I have not seen in almost 2 years. So if I can get her to stop being such a bitch, I could potentially see him often. The school I found is very similar to the school I am in now. Not only that but it is on the same schedule as my current school, and after talking to them and starting the transfer process, I will not miss any time. This all seems to easy.

I spoke with my boss at work about moving and have already started the ball rolling of transferring to a new site back home. Everything seems to be lined up perfectly. I am now just waiting for the bombshell to come down.

Everybody that really knows me knows that I am a religious man. To those on the outside I may seem like the opposite, but that’s just who I am. Yes I have the mouth of a drunken sailor, and the sense of humor of an atheist, but I know God, I love God, and I know what he is capable of. This whole move just seems too right, and that’s how I know it is a God thing. I have seriously been wondering and planning how to move back to bama over the last 6 or so months. Never really prayed about it though, but that big dude knows what’s on your mind; you don’t have to say anything. This starts to roll into a new topic.

Why is he making this happen? Over the last 2 years I lost a ton of faith in him, not completely, but a lot. I started to get some back while I was playing guitar in church and spending time around a church family, but after starting this new job that went away as well. And even with everything that fell into place I still do not have much faith that this move will go off as smoothly as expected. I need a good amount of money to move across the country and not real sure that I will have it. I think he made this happen because he knows this is the only way that I will put a bit of focus on him. I was always closest with him when I as in Alabama.

I look forward to being back home and I know that this is probably the last fresh start I will get in my life. I need to make sure this one counts. I made a choice recently to grab my life by the nuts and take what I want, and put myself where I want to be, not to take no for an answer, and make my life better than it is. This seems to be a leap in that direction.

Here is to my last beginning – The Meat Hammer 

For the Ladies Pt. 2

I know this took a while to get up, but here it is. Not all responses were added, and if you want one specifically answered then let me know. If you are somewhat lost on this or need a reference, then check out this blog for info.

Ok ladies, I got some feedback and I want to address some of them. Of course, as always I do not use real names, but enough for you to be identified if you read it. I will do the same here, but you probably will know who you are by re-reading your response. I will break it down per person….. Here we go.

tAble-

I hear you loud and clear. It took me a while to decide how to go about this. Maid touched on your point as well. I have gone for crazy bitches. And I have met the nice sweet girls that I know would stay the nice sweet girls. The few nice sweet girls I have met there has always been some sort of complication. And I guess it does go both ways here. Complications have included distance, physical attraction, point of views, and even future goals.  Which leads into a whole new topic…… do we exaggerate these complications?

Muddy water-

You brought up a good point “call me old fashioned but I want to be pursued. I don't want to be the one chasing after a guy. I've done that a few times and it never works out.”  I see your point here. And this will also answer your question to me. The nice guys get shut out so many times, it’s hard for them to suck it up again and talk to another girl, knowing they will get the same reaction. So, to any other girl that asks “why can’t I find a nice guy” you have to make a move too. Simple as that. If the nice guy thinks he stands a decent chance… most of the time he will pursue. But it’s a fine line to not lose that old fashioned way of dating. Your opinion of sex/porn all that jazz- I totally see your point. I was raised a southern Christian man and I know exactly where you are coming from (I honestly believe that sex is meant to be between a husband and wife) but it’s out there and I don’t know of a guy that has not seen it in some form or fashion.

Maid – (man that sounds derogatory, not meaning to)

First off, hello there stranger!

You are more than right; I personally have for some reason only fallen for crazy bitches. Do you remember the short girl I was dating up there? PSYCHO! And if anybody knows how to judge this beforehand I will pay a large sum of something! Lol. I laughed at one of your responses about video games. I can remember when a new game came out, me and my roommate got home and you were waiting for us. We walked in and turned on our Xboxes and zoned out the rest of the world =). I agree, guys that spend all day every day on the Xbox is dumb. I think everyone has said the same thing about this…. as long as it does not take up your entire life. This leaves me to wonder…. Does every girl really think that, or do they say it because it makes them look good? And about being a nerd, I just agree. I am going to repost your answer because I could not say it better myself…

“There is nothing wrong with nerds!!! They are typically the guy you want. They are the ones

that are around most often, not cheaters and seem to have respect for others. It’s the jocks or

"tough guys" that are generally the assholes. That’s my opinion anyway. Any why can't you collect

things? It’s not immature. us girls just collect different things.. usually coats and shoes or some

form of clothing. what’s the difference? There isn’t any”

I have never thought of it like that, but it is very true. I know of a guy that would probably use that for the rest of his life. As a matter of fact I am going to probably use that often now. You will forever be immortalized because of that. The porn issue, good point as well. I seem to get two sides of this which I will bring up at the end.

Au Rugby-

War Eagle and I will kick your ass in NCAA 12

Others have mentioned the same thing when it comes to jealousy and guys looking at girls. You are self conscious. But we are with you, and if we leave you for them because they look better, dress better whatever, then you are better without us. And if we are with you, we (I) don’t want you to be her, I want you.

Also just to throw in the quote here…

                “TWILIGHT IS GAY!!”

Canadian-

I have to start with your question. I read this at work and could not stop laughing. My co-worker probably thought I was high.

                ”This is my guy question: Is it true that if a guy places his hand backwards while masturbating that it feels like someone else is doing it? I think it is called "the stranger." Just curious.”

I have not the slightest clue. Maybe one day I will let you know…. Keep an eye out for my email lol. My God I miss you! Also, make your own damn sandwich. Your response fell in line with everything else really, hard to pick something out.

Midget –

I think maybe you brought up the best point, but sadly not one I have not heard before. Girls marry their dad. Same foot, guys marry their mom. Makes sense. Also as others have said the sex/porn thing I will bring up next.

The general opinion about sex/porn/threesomes and as midget so calmly put it “thrown on the couch and pounded in the ass” comes down to an intimacy thing. That’s understandable. But does that really make it bad? Maid mentioned it as a together thing, not alone. I have heard this too. It is like something to spice up the relationship. Really I could care less I have my opinion of it and that’s what I think. Period. Good to know a woman’s thoughts though.

This was interesting to read. I am sure I will hear a little bit more in the next few days or so…. And I don’t really know what I was going to do with this information. And yes as I was told by a buddy, maybe I should just get the sand out of my vagina. Who cares because every woman is different and they are all crazy and dumb in some way or fashion.